Orcasional Musings | Just some of life’s little ironies

— Orcasional Musings by Steve Henigson —

King County:

About 15 years ago, Washington State’s most populous county, King County, changed its name.

It’s still King County, but instead of being named for Franklin Pierce’s Vice President, W. Rufus King, it is now named for Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

The reason given for this change was that Vice President King was a slave owner, which, in modern revisionist history, is now seen as being unforgivably reprehensible, while, on the other hand, Dr. King was descended from slaves—perhaps even those once owned by Vice President King’s family—who had been freed by President Lincoln’s Emancipation Proclamation.

The irony of this act of historical revisionism lies in the fact that Washington State was named for our first President, George Washington, who was also a slave owner. But nobody has ever suggested that Washington State be renamed, perhaps to honor Booker T. Washington.

Further irony is to be found in the fact that Presidents Washington, Jefferson, and Monroe (among others) were all slave owners, yet they worked hard to develop a system of government which, in the end, made the freeing of the slaves, their education, their full citizenship and right to vote, and their admission into the halls of government, all inevitable.

Playing Golf:

Samuel Clemens, writing as Mark Twain, once noted that, “Golf is a good walk, spoiled.” He seems to have been correct, judging by the large number of golfers who ride around the course in motorized golf carts.

One of our golf-playing friends has complained to us that she prefers to play elsewhere than on the Orcas Island Golf Course. Her stated reason is that our island’s links are too hilly, its grass is either too dry and rough or too swampy, and its hazards are too primitive. She says that this makes the Orcasian course too difficult for her to play upon, and that seems quite strange to us, because we had always thought that golfers prefer a challenge, which is the whole point of the game.

Wild Animals:

We feed sunflower seeds and suet to the birds who live around us. We also feed the local raccoons, who scarf up cheap dry dog food by the bucketful. We set out peanuts and sunflower seeds for the squirrels, and dried corn for the deer.

But there are people who criticize us for doing all this feeding. They tell us, “You shouldn’t do that. Those animals will become all too accustomed to people, which puts their lives in danger. Also, the animals you feed will never learn how to forage for themselves, and if you stop feeding them, they’ll starve.”

But the very people who tell us this, themselves set out bird feeders filled with carefully chosen seed mixes. Somehow, it’s acceptable to feed birds, who are cute and sweet and who sing such lovely songs, but it’s wrong to feed raccoons and squirrels and deer. We haven’t quite figured out the “why” of this irony, yet.

Automobiles:

We recently noticed a very sleek (and obviously expensive) Bentley sports or grand-touring car parked on an Eastsound street, and that set us to wondering: Where on Orcas could such a car be put to use? Our most permissive speed limit is merely 40 miles per hour, which would hardly take this car out of first gear.

A neighbor, who has now moved off-island, until recently maintained a gorgeous, bright red, Porsche Grand Touring car in his humble garage. He took me for a ride in it, once. He duly got it up to 40 wherever that was allowed, and, indeed, it really never needed to be shifted out of first. The most fun we had was when he roared us up to a stop sign at the full 40, and then, at the very last second, gently toed the brake pedal. Talk about “stopping on a dime”: It was Whiplash City! We were in a car that was built for speed, but the best we could do was to make it stop.

Ironies abound all around us, if we would just notice them. They are all instructive, and some of them are even funny. Keep your eye peeled for the next one which passes by somewhere near you, and then learn…and laugh.