||| FROM LEARNER LIMBACH |||

I want to say something about loneliness. I’m someone who can do well being alone for long periods of time, and often. I’m generally happy for the opportunity to zero in on the things I’m working on without distractions. This is part of who I am and perhaps part of why I am effective at the work that I do. That said, everything has its limits. I realized a couple of weeks ago for the first time that I was experiencing feelings of loneliness and isolation. It’s hard to admit, let alone talk about, as I’m not the best at exposing my vulnerabilities. I think that because I tend to isolate myself in work as it is, I didn’t really realize that it was reaching a different level during the pandemic. The in-person social connection that I’ve always had on a regular basis, and the deeper friend relationships that were easier to maintain before the pandemic, have always generally helped me achieve a good balance. But that changed during the pandemic. I’ve been feeling it, and I’ve been hearing it from friends, in increasing numbers. A quick internet search turns up dozens of articles and videos about the increasing loneliness and mental health issues due to the pandemic.

This is not to downplay the seriousness of the COVID-19 virus at all, but I do think that more attention needs to be paid to the fact that this public health crisis is also a crisis of loneliness for many people. It’s clear that online events, while useful, are not a replacement for real in-person connection. How can we do more to support deeper relationship building, and a feeling of belonging in community, as the pandemic drags on? How do we do this for ourselves, and others? This is something I’ll be giving more attention to in the coming weeks and months.

I think there is a tendency to feel shame around our loneliness. I know this because that’s my tendency. It feels vulnerable to talk about. But being vulnerable is exactly how we connect with one another, and speaking up can help give others “permission” to be vulnerable as well. We’re not as alone as we think.

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