||| FROM EDWIN WORDSWORTH |||
An open letter to the sensible,
How few of us there are, of late.
I know I don’t speak for myself alone when I announce that I for one have no temperament for this socialist hubbub about minimum wages and affordable housing. My America is built on an entirely different notion, a Greater notion, you might say. Why, in my time, a grand, domineering, monopolistic company simply owned all the residences in and around it’s operational locale and rented said residences to its workforce at a profit. The company, in this way, is like a discerning father, whose mere existence provides the means for his children to be housed and nourished, and whose wealth insures a secure and comfortable future for his family for generations. Furthermore, when, on occasion, his child is compelled to defy or question his acumen, a father must edify his progeny by force.
Regarding minimum wages to be paid; the wage is a most powerful tool which ought not to be manipulated by governments. A man will not work if he does not hunger; pay him a wage for his labor and he may attend to his stomach. Too great a wage, and he shall become slothful, which is wicked. It is a fact that common men have no righteous purpose for surplus monies, and we should have no purpose to allow him any. We have only to observe the so called “boom-towns” where men are compelled to gamble, drink, and fornicate their fortunes to nothingness just as soon as they receive them. How can such a man contribute to our great society if he is motivated only by his vises? Let us allow the Market to decide his worth, not our corruptible institutions of so-called governance.
The Marxist scheme to artificially reduce the value of housing is detestable, and frankly un-American. From the founding of this Great Bastion of Liberty, land has always been a prime commodity. I’ll present to you a most simplified formula for the acquisition of land, which has proven faultless:
First, claim a largely unoccupied (and just as importantly uncivilized) mass of land.
Second, use the funds which have been bequeathed to you from generations of familial wealth-building, that which has originated ultimately from God, and bestowed upon your righteous ancestors.
Thirdly, build from nothing a vast empire of mining, production, and importantly, real estate in order to perpetuate your wealth.
Fourth, assemble a force to defend this wealth, as necessary.
In summary, if the aforementioned guidelines are carefully observed, I cannot understand the need for such tendencies as a minimum wage, nor affordable housing. The company provides tenements for its workforce, that’s obvious enough, and a wage, although evidently superfluous, is paid simply to compliment the ultimate reward, which is, plainly, a job well done.
I, along with my multitudinous constituents, believe is high time to in a word, invalidate this disturbing trend among the liberal charlatans of our fair land. The most affordable aspect to affordable housing is the fantasy itself. There will always the those who are willing to sell their time for the going rate which the Market dictates. Let us not allow a few dissidents to spoil this nigh flawless system. This is the natural way, shown to us from On High.
Produced for your consideration, in the spirits of
J. Hill, H. Ford, A. Carnegie, C. Vanderbilt, J. D. Rockefeller, and penned by E. Artemis Wordsworth
I see it as an indication of the state of the nation that it took me a minute to realize where it was that you were going. Or perhaps it’s just my brain cells dying. Good work.
Ha! So saith the “multitudinous” one percent. Excellent satire “Mr. Wordsworth.”
Well done. Maybe time for another reading of A Modest Proposal.
A nostalgic look back at the days of the OLD REPUBLIC, when we were free!
Thankfully we’ve been saved from any further such nonsense by the Blue Tsunami that ushered in, with broad consensus, the longed for Progressive Administrative State. Just look at all it has accomplished in just one year!
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All thanks to the Democratic Party;
Happy days are here again,
The sky above is clear again,
Let us sing a song of cheer again,
Happy days are here again!
Hang on folks, Reality wins, it always wins!
Be still my heart.
If this is not irony or sarcasm, it’s a voice from the Middle Ages. A feudal lord to his serfs.
Can I have the 3 minutes back in my life spent reading this word salad gibberish?
Brilliant, Watson.
OK, Mr. Wordsworth, I want to read a Covid commentary…
I assume this bizarre tract is intended as dark satire, channeling the desires of the robber barons and a number of our current crop of billionaires who think carpenters etc. are being overpaid.
ROBBER BARONS – With unlimited funds bequeathed from generations of familial wealth-building!
James J. Hill was the son of a hired farmhand who died when Hill was 14 compelling him to find work with a local grocer.
Henry Ford was one of eight children born on the family farm. He attended a one-room school when he was not helping his father with the harvest. At age 16 he walked from Dearborne to Detroit to find work in a machine shop.
Andrew Carnegie was born into a family of Scottish weavers displaced by the industrial revolution. His father and uncle were leaders of the failed Chartist labor movement earning them the hostility of the merchant class. “I began to learn what poverty meant,” he later wrote. “It was burnt into my heart then that my father had to beg for work. And then and there came the resolve that I would cure that when I got to be a man.” His mother’s sister had immigrated to America eight years earlier and had written “This country’s far better for the working man than the old one.”
Cornelius Vanderbilt’s father was a farmer who worked part time ferrying produce between Staten Island and Manhattan. As a boy, he worked with his father on the water and attended school briefly.
John D. Rockefeller was born into a large and poor family in upstate New York. At 16 he got a job as an assistant bookkeeper where among other things he excelled at collecting overdue accounts in a “pleasant, patient but persistent manner.”
Ah, Phil Peterson’s point seems to be that it is actually the descendants of those he named that are the robber barons, and not the originator of those vasts fortunes? A helpful correction, that, I am sure.
Ditto, Samuel Webster.
I’m going to laugh because this can only be satire !
This may not have been one of my most notable do-I-post-this-or-not decisions.