||| BY WALTER ZUSTOVICH, theORCASONIAN GUEST REPORTER |||
With the popularity of Orcas Island reaching new post-pandemic highs, a loose coalition of on-and off-island developers called Building the Future is seeing an opportunity to bring Eastsound proper into the 21st century.
Noting two recent projects adding luxury rental suites to Main Street along with upgrades to Prune Alley, a group spokesperson enthused that, “The future of Eastsound is ripe for an upgrade. While the small-town feel has worked in the past, there’s a new generation of visitors that expects an experience more in line with where modern trends of travel are taking us.”
The group has already been in contact with local officials and county departments to examine current regulations and explore strategies for expediting such a makeover. An un-named county official shrugs off the expectation of local pushback, saying “The county has turned a corner, and Orcas Island cannot be excluded. Most residents will come to appreciate that we took action now, before other competitors beat us to the punch. And imagine what we could do with the additional tax revenue!”
Building the Future’s efforts have not gone unnoticed. An opposing coalition of local residents called Fight the Madness has been shadowing the coalition’s initiative, vowing to “mobilize the resources we have to retain the sense of community that has made this place special.” When asked to further clarify what that resistance might look like, the group’s hooded representative, speaking on a Zoom call, simply shook his head. “Whatever it takes.”
**If you are reading theOrcasonian for free, thank your fellow islanders. If you would like to support theOrcasonian CLICK HERE to set your modestly-priced, voluntary subscription. Otherwise, no worries; we’re happy to share with you.**
Best to keep a close eye on that shadowy “Drink the Kool-Aid” group as well, they may be up to no good…
This article follows a true and loved island news tradition, the timely leg pull, with tongue in cheek. many thanks!
Well done! Caught my eye, as you always do.
I almost forgot that today was April 1st !!!
Well, I just hope there’s a bridge or three involved!- and I vote for filling in Fishing Bay so we can build luxury hi-rises there; it might piss off the former “waterfront” parcel owners, but screw-em! Then we could put barracks on whidbey island naval base and barge them to work here, or maybe fly ’em over on growlers. that would solve the working class housing problem!.
Ah, Sadie, but the Whidbey Growlers have been sent to Poland, or some such place.
yikes, Lin – then we needn’t plan for anything beyond about 3 weeks from now, when some idiot pushes the button. I wish I could say that was April Fools tomfoolery but frankly, no joke – I’m terrified of the idiocy of war between two nuclear superpowers.
I have to agree with you Sadie, I too awaken each morning wondering whether the bomb has been used yet. Just a matter of time I think. Scary.
Oh wow. I was about to have another stroke! I really must take note of dates…..Holy cow people! Don’t give anyone ideas….