Aging Like a Guru | Dying… What choice do I have?

— from Rosie Kuhn —

“The Person Who Dies with the Most Toys Wins!”

Anonymous

When you read a good book, especially a novel, and you’ve stayed attentive and engaged to the very end, you want that last sentence to stay with you forever! A great writer might even craft the whole book around the very essence of this exquisite, rapturous moment. 

Each of us are crafting our lives consciously, and to a greater degree unconsciously. Throughout our days, years, and decades we create an undercurrent of ideas of where we are headed. We may be entrenched in circumstances beyond our control, where uncertainty undermines our courage. At other times we feel as if we are experiencing Heaven on Earth, when life couldn’t get any sweeter. All along the way we are writing the ending to our story. A few years ago, I was going through some really deep work. It was one of those moments where I prayed to God that I would fall asleep and not wake up. As challenging as this time was with despair and desperation, so much wisdom came to me, too. There was no escaping the process so I figured I might as well stay in it. This one night, I asked myself, “Since I can’t control when I die or how I die, I choose to control the experience I want to have while I die. So, what is the quality of the experience I want to have in that last final moment?” 

The response seemed to come easily from somewhere outside myself: “I want to die with love in my heart.” “Wow! That’s a nice answer.” (I talk to myself a lot, especially when immersed in these deep dark sessions.)

I then became curious about what it would be like to die with love in my heart. What would that be like to hold every person I know in complete and utter love? And so, I began to imagine loving people who don’t necessarily love me, and those who are really hard to love, and those who love me for who I am. It was as though I began to write the final moments of my novel – my life.

Since then, like most of us, I often find myself revisiting thoughts about dying, how afraid I am of suffering, of dying alone, or dying terrified of the uncertainty of the end. And I remember that I can’t control any of that, so I can once again bring my focus on dying with love in my heart. This practice always brings me peace, because I have certainty that when that final moment comes, I’ll have practiced the steps to experience the exquisite fulfillment of love into my heart. Cool, right? 

For more blogs, books, videos, or if you are interested in coaching or training with Dr. Rosie, check out her website:  www.theparadigmshifts.com. And her podcast can be found at aginglikeaguru.podbean.com. The book Aging Like a Guru – Who Me? and Dr. Rosie’s other books are available at Darvill’s Bookstore, the Cottage Gift Shop, and Amazon.