||| BY MARILYN PERATIVE, BEHIND THE SCENES EDITOR |||
They are called “Non-Fungible Tokens (NFT),” or simply, cryptoart. And when one sold recently at Christie’s auction for a staggering $69M, it only took a few minutes to realize that we have a similar work of art lying fallow in theOrcasonian archives, just awaiting this same level of discovery, appreciation, and fiscal attention..
Billed by the auction house as “a unique work in the history of digital art,” “Everydays — The First 5000 Days” is a collage of all the images that Mike Winkelmann, the digital artist known as Beeple, has been posting online each day since 2007.
We at theOrcasonian haven’t necessarily been posting images back as far as 2007, like Beeple, but an unofficial survey of our works on hand indicates there are thousands in our resource files, memorializing faces, incidents, passings, all the photographic evidence of life in the San Juans since November 2008.
This is truly a one-of-a-kind offer. The image to the right is only a small sample of what’s available, of what could soon be your own Orcasonian NFT showcasing our life, our history, our crazy island in a way that is not available to the general public.
Bids should probably start at $1M in order to speed up the process on the way to $69M. And as soon as we receive confirmation of that opening bid, then and only then will we seek the services of a professional auction house to guide us through the process, as theOrcasonian staff has no prior experience, and therefore no talent, in conducting such high-class auctions (or really any auction at all).
In order to place an initial bid, you may email theOrcasonian, complete with all pertinent information and the appropriate number of zeros. I will then forward that information to Lin for appropriate follow-up.
Let the bidding begin…
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I must have this NFT. It is the stuff that dreams re made of. And craptoart is unquestionably the art of the future. Leonardo, Rembrandt, Van Gogh, eat your hearts out. Therefore I am going to make a takeout bid of $70 million, which, incidentally, will beat the recent Christie’s auction record of 69M. We had intended to direct these funds toward combating deer crossing the road, and other problems that beset residents of our wondrous isle. But you’re right. This offer, thankfully open only to Orcasonian readers (thus keeping mainland billionaires at bay), is truly irresistible. We’ believe our bid will snuff out the competition, but, if anyone on the island is foolish enough to try to outbid us, well, as the Orcasonian article cocludes, “Let the bidding begin…”
While Mr. Rhoads’ willingness and desire to immediately out-bid anyone else who may be interested in obtaining theOrcasonian NFT is admirable, I do feel that perhaps he is missing the point of bidding. In offering $70M, which may be out of reach of a few Orcasions who had their hearts set on owning, or at least, being involved in the building excitement of the bidding process, he has, in effect, closed the process to further proceedings.
Mr. Rhoads’ action has made both the whole point of bidding, and the need to involve a respectable (or any) auction house in the process, totally moot. There’s no need to even go on with this process.
Although I am pleased for the opportunity to have tested the waters on how best to raise funds to keep theOrcasonian afloat; I am quite distressed that this sincere, valid attempt to fund theOrcasonian for the rest of its natural life has been co-opted. Obviously, a new strategy is required that perhaps does not involve the valuable NFT we still have in our archival possession.
Until then, please visit https://theorcasonian.com/support/ to offer your support of “the voice of the Orcas Community.” That system is not yet setup to accept amounts over one million dollars, but I’m sure we can work something out.
Sorry, Mr. Rhoads. A valiant effort!
(I think this may be the first time in my whole life I have turned down an offer of $70 million.)
Well, Lin, I’ve faced plenty of rejection, but this is certainly the first time in my life that I’ve been rejected after offering to pay $70 million. Despite this humiliation, or maybe because of it, I I did as you requested (suggested? demanded?). I visited https://theorcasonian.com/support/ and performed the PayPal dance. I wanted to regain my dignity by donating $70M, but my wife said, “Honey, click on $100, you can always give more later.” We’ve been together for 42 years, and, not wanting to risk the streak, I followed her instructions Seeing as I’ve been restrained from hogging the glory, I guess a bunch of other Orcasonians are going to have to add some clicks. BTW, Lin, please call me Rick. Being called “Mr. Rhoads,” or, even worse, “sir,” reminds me of this guy in uniform who put his hand on my head as he encouraged me to get into the back seat of his car.
Rick, your offer of $100 in place of the $70m is inspiring. At this rate ($100/month), it will take (according to my limited calculations) 700,000 months to pay off your $70 million obligation. I’m willing if you are. Thank you for rescuing yourself from this debacle and allowing us both to save face in the process. Admirable!