Sun Days on Orcas | What you can’t find under the tree

||| SUN DAYS ON ORCAS by EDEE KULPER |||

What do you really need on this Christmas day? Even if you don’t need it, what is it you long for? What do you want?

If you could be given anything by anyone, tangible or intangible, what would it be?

Do you need to forgive or ask for forgiveness from someone in your past or present? Do you need to set aside money somehow to go back to school for a degree you never got but realize you should have? Do you need a break from caring for people in your life so you can take care of yourself properly? Do you need a break from caring amply for yourself so you can start thinking about how to bring magic to the lives of others? Do you need more depth after leading a shallow life? Do you need more lightness, for the weight you’ve carried so long?

For the 5,000-ish people on this island, each one of us will have a different answer. A different need or want. Most likely, no present under the tree will fulfill it.

Each year when Christmas nears, I feel ever more strongly about the obligation of buying, making, and giving presents. What I’d really rather do is be part of something that truly helps everyone. What I’d love to see is even one year of Christmasing around the globe be rerouted so that everyone’s money that would normally go toward gifts under the tree go instead to people around the world who don’t yet have the basics like clean water, food, shelter, safety, or an education. I know many of us already contribute to those things, but imagine if we ALL did it collectively, how it would change the world in one December month. (I think the same thing every Halloween too.)

Back to my original question though.

Just stop reading for a few minutes, set your computer aside (and everything else around you) and think about it. Close your eyes if it helps.

What did you come up with?

Sometimes this season is so busy that we don’t simply stop and think in a quiet place.

Keep thinking if you need the space to sit and dwell for a while.

Is what you need something that someone else can give you? If so, I encourage you to ask someone for it, whether it’s forgiveness, or time spent with you, or peaceful relations. Is it something you can do for yourself? Do you need to reroute your life? Step out and start working toward a dream? Close one area of your life in order to open another?

Perhaps you may find that just thinking about this makes you long for more time to think about it. Our culture tells us to stay busy, but remember, this is Orcas Island. You have beautiful spaces and places to go out (or stay in) and think.

When I ask myself those questions, what I need most is to feel like my life has meaning. My kids are getting older, and yes, they still need me, but I loved how much they needed me all those years and now it is slowly changing. They are getting older. As they need me less, I don’t want to gradually start caring too well for myself. There are an awful lot of people and animals out there who need help in the world – I dream of things like working on the Mercy Ship in Africa, or helping in a clinic where women from small villages desperately need fistula surgeries, or holding babies in an orphanage, or playing with rescued baby elephants or pangolins. Or teaching basic English or math to people who long to learn.

I also need to ponder deep things that I’ll never figure out – the mysteries that aren’t ever truly known (as you may have read over the past three weeks in this column). I need to hear people’s thoughts on God and the universe. I love hearing how and what people think. I’m not sure I will ever tire of it.

This season, one of my favorite orators – who ponders life and also loves to know how other people ponder deep matters – is working on an ongoing project to put his thoughts and the thoughts of others out in the world for those of us who crave theological discussion. Dick Staub is his name, and may his gift of oration and discussion fill some of your need to ponder such things. Go to his new website to watch him explain what is to come: https://www.dickstaub.com/work/about.

How I would love to know what all of the things are that you readers are needing right now. If there is anything you need that can’t be found under a tree, feel free to be bold and use the comments section below to put it out there. Perhaps another reader can help you. Perhaps simply putting it out there will create change you can’t make on your own. Do not be afraid to ask for what you need.

For all other wants and needs, may you find ways to reach out to others, mend issues from your past, change your life’s trajectory, or change someone else’s for the better, so that Christmas means more than what’s wrapped up in boxes.

May you have a wonderful Christmas, and if you find yourself alone or lonely even if you’re not alone, or craving the deep meaning of Christmas, you are welcome at any island church to celebrate this day.

Merry Christmas!