— by Lin McNulty, Managing Editor —

Hi, I’m Toby and I’m looking for other Bernese Mountain Dogs to march alongside me in the Pet Parade.

Last year, Toby, an attractive Bernese Mountain Dog was a candidate for Orcas Mayor, campaigning as “Another chance to vote for Bernie.” He lost.

Rescued by Linda Bannerman and Brad Brown from a breeding operation where he had been imprisoned for two years, Toby is passionate about the right of all people and animals to have a loving, safe, affordable home in an accepting community. That was a big part of his campaign. He lost.

This year, Toby is emerging from last year’s defeat to pursue another issue near and dear to his canine heart. While some may view it as a reflection of our current political divisiveness, Toby is looking forward to participating in this year’s Kaleidoscope Pet Parade, with one caveat: He wants to hang out with more of his own kind. Toby wants other Bernese Mountain Dogs to join him in the parade. In other words, Toby is choosing to employ identity politics in his pursuit of fame.

Weighing in at well over 90 pounds, his breed hails from the Alps of Switzerland, long acknowledged by the world community as a neutral country. Toby has a deep connection to the country; after all, his breed name comes from the capital city of Bern. He explains that he is not at all discriminatory — or breedist — and he barks his neutrality. He wants to hang out with all breeds, even those cute miniature dogs, and even some pets of species much different than him — say a cat, or a rooster, or a pig.

But when it comes to what he really yearns for this year, Toby is launching his return to public life based on appearances. He wants to participate in the Pet Parade with more of his own kind — along with, of course, as many members of other pet breeds as possible, given our remote island location where exotic animals don’t necessarily reside. Last year’s visiting bear was an anomaly and Toby considers himself to be nearly the same size as any old bear that may come swimming ashore. He acknowledges that he may need to work more on looking tough, but that captivating smile just won’t go away.

This year, Bernese Mountain Dogs are invited to march (or meander) along with Toby at the annual Kaleidoscope Pet Parade on Saturday, May 26 at 11 a.m. in Eastsound.

UPDATED on May 23 to reflect that the annual Pet Parade is sponsored by Kaleidoscope.